preparing the cards for my classmates tomorrow.. cutting drawing and keeping it inside my file.. didi is kind enough to go to causeway point and helped me print out the namelist for the jupiter watch which i need it tomorrow.. and he is kind enough to buy me my curry puff and popiah for my breakfast cum lunch.. mummy wasnt home.. daddy was going out.. didi was at causeway point.. i am all alone at home again.. i dont even understand.. things are so unpredictable.. still remember last time i would be the one always not at home.. but now everything turn the other way round.. ha~~ whatever.. yvonne is always feeling lonely de.. so no different!!
wanted to sleep at around 3plus.. cause i was really tired.. it could be the reason cause yesterday got one very funny ger called me up at 2plus in the night.. this ger noe who is she.. she made me eyes big big after that.. the sudden urge of going there to find her was coming into me.. haha.. at 3plus i was lying on my bed.. tears roll down once again.. i admit i was not alright.. cause of what happened yesterday.. my mind was in a mess again.. i didnt noe what to do.. i really hate everything.. i couldnt make my mind clear now.. this is dragging long.. haish.. let's count how long i have been emo-ing.. one week!! after tomorrow will be one week le.. haish.. i always seems so strong.. but i dont think i am..
i gave up after that.. i force myself to stop thinking.. i get out of my bed and tried to watch whatever is on television.. and it was time when i watch shao gong.. when i saw him.. i was feeling a little weird.. i still miss him much like before.. i guess he will always be the one who will be able to make me smile and happy.. a little gesture by him.. i will be contented.. i truely miss him and i want him to be in front of me now.. but is that possible?? rain rain~~ will is he coming?? you noe?? ha!
okay due to the boredness inside me.. i decided to try making the gui lin gao after taking the recipe for my cousin.. heex.. initially it wasnt sweet at all.. so mummy ask me to pour everything inside and cook.. imagine i have added the whole packet of cane sugar lah!! wah.. but it wasnt that sweet.. should be just nice bah.. i pour it into one big one two small one.. let see who i shall give this time round.. =))
in life.. shouldnt i be contented with everything?? but i dont think that is the case.. i am always complaining that i dont want this.. i dont want that.. i hate this i hate that.. i guess i shouldnt complain that much bah.. can i dont noe why.. i dont have courage.. whenever i got this feeling to say something.. i called that person everything will not come out.. i dont like this at all.. haish.. forget it bah.. like what i wrote in my SAM reflection.. i am a timid ger who is afraid of everything.. so no different at all.. =)
who will dry up my tears??
处女座个性
因为水星是处女座的守护星，影响到处女座的人追求完美，挑剔和神经紧张，吹毛求疵正是他们的特性。处女座的人大都很谦虚，但很容易为自己带来压力，许多人一听到处女座就很害怕，明知他们挑剔，唠叨又婆婆妈妈，和人相处很不愉怏，人际关系“认真麻麻”，不过处女座的人爱帮助别人是另一事实。所有处女座的人都喜欢忙碌，他们不可以闲着没事做，为他人服务是他们的人生目标。缺乏自信的处女座有时候组织能力很差，是对自己没信心所致；他们需要朋友和家人的鼓励去推动他们。天生担忧的性格也令他们容易悲观的！
just a random post.. looking at it i feel so weird.. maybe that is really how a virgo behave like bah.. i can never stand loneliness.. i like my life to be busy like a bee.. i can never stand it to be very bored and nothing to do.. haha.. that is very true.. stress is also given to me by myself.. haha.. maybe that is my character bah.. see this i feel a little unable to speak.. LOL~
wah i admit once again i didnt listen in class.. my mind was elsewhere but not in the class.. it resulted in i couldnt really understand budgetting.. LOL~ and out of the sudden.. i became a little random.. i was telling qingling what i wrote in my SAM reflection.. "hamster is cute and so am i" this was what i said.. and qingling was using the pencil to stab herself.. alright fine.. later i tell it to sam and eileen.. and ta ta.. yvonne got this stupid certificate from xueting.. =.= and still got witness de kays.. hello i just said the fact kays!! i am as cute as hamster.. oopsie!!
this was the first piece i received whereby i gave it back to xueting.. and then xueting and sam started calling ah hua.. maddie lah.. still say i sell dao hua.. oh gosh.. siao liao lah.. =.=went for break for 1hour and rush back for CD2.1 tutorial.. reached class only.. xueting came over and passed me somethings after i came back after toilet.. and it was the certificate again.. this time round got more witnesses.. okay lah.. dumb kays!! maddie de leh.. then nicole they all think very fun ar.. all of them go and sign.. imagine it involved up till 15 people.. gosh.. rubbish!! they are talking rubbish!!
this is the certificate which is still with me.. =.= they are so dumb can.. anyhow de oh.. -.- nevermind.. cause i am still going to say i am as cute as a hamster.. wahahaha..
after lecture it was still early.. i was still feeling happy cause i finally got a date.. but it turn out to be.. ehem.. forget it.. i went home straight after that feeling a little emo.. haish.. okay yvonne life is turning a little not stable.. whatever i wish for will never come true.. i dont even noe why.. it will always be the opposite side which result in me very very sad.. haish.. what so ever.. i will never wish for anything now.. i hate it all!!
okay although i dont have a date.. i still have my godsisters to accompany me.. that why i say i always lurv them.. they make my day.. we were making father's day card.. veyr creative man.. =)) we went to take steven uncle new car.. wah.. it was sooo cool.. on our way.. we were busy snapping photos.. haha.. nice nice.. =))
annabelle.. aileen and me.. we having this nice nice shot.. =D
wah.. unglam us.. haha.. we lurv to stick out our tongue!! cute right?? =X
this is steven uncle new car.. grey in colour.. we went to loyang temple after that to wash car and pai pai.. then aileen fell down.. she is a strong ger.. only drop a few tears.. i was trying my best to coax her.. lucky she is alright after that.. just hope that her wounds would hurt when she touch water bah.. went home at 9pm.. was feeling a little clubbish mood cause i was listening to smack that inside the car.. but i didnt join xinyi after that cause something happen.. assignments assignments again!! wah now i hate it.. was talking to xinyi on phone.. she was telling me to relax.. but i got the temptation to cry out.. haish.. hen xiang zai fang sheng da ku.. and she said again that monday i will be able to see her.. but i told her i dont feel happy at all.. like what i said in the letter to her.. i would rather not want it if that the case.. i will hate attachment after that.. =((
alright enough of those.. some random photos..
annabelle and me when we were at Bukit Timah food centre.. see her dummy face.. feel like slapping!! haha..
okay aileen is always sweet.. she will always kiss you when she see you not feeling happy.. she will hug onto you for long.. i lurv her!!
yvonne is fearful of everything.. she rejects lurv.. she rejects hugs and she rejects kisses!! all this always hurt her deep deep and make her sad.. so she would rather she reject everything.. she doesnt want all this.. what she wants is her company.. but no one will noe.. she hates everything in life.. she is never be able to turn the time and walk back to where she want to stay on.. she will lose everything sooner or later.. call her a loser or what.. but she admit she is losing.. she dont have any hopes to pin on now.. just treat her as dead.. she is never going to be alive again..
life is never beautiful when you lose it
today i so tired.. in the end i woke up at 6.30am and forge that i need to be in school by 8.30am.. so i was rushing like mad.. didnt have my breakfast too.. went straight to school and i saw lingkwee jieying weeling and gary at interchange.. we went to school together.. lurv lurv!! met eileen at canteen 1 co-op before heading to class.. walk as fast as we can.. haha.. reached on time.. yippee!! then do up the ppt slide and finally everything is prepared!!
during activity was like being a dumb ger.. i was the narrator and the promptor as well.. i didnt noe i was doing extra until we had our talk after the session.. i was shock kays!! so dumb but i do notice something.. some people just stand there do nothing.. was not very happy with that.. then was rather not happy with the response of those people as well.. fine nevermind.. i had fun with some groups too.. =) and i realised my voice didnt change much when using mic.. haha.. that was a relieve cause i was talking through the mic for the whole session.. haha..
oh ya i brought whistle to school too.. for nicole and huishan.. and i brought my "du du" whistle.. it remind me of what happened during 2005.. it was the best year man.. i had fun chasing 183 club and that was the time when i fall in lurv with yurong and shaowei korkor.. i had wonderful moments then.. happiest and fun moments which i can never forget i guess.. lovely issnt it?? haha.. i took pictures with my "du du" whistle.. haha.. zi lian-ing in class.. so long didnt eat "du du" liao.. wahaha..
quite an ugly photo kays.. but i look so funny with that "du du" inside my mouth.. gosh!! =))
break time was cut short today cause we were discussing our report.. went to library and guess what.. my $5 drop!! and i dont noe where i drop.. dumb me.. i getting more and more dumb recently after much incident.. wah piangz.. i was feeling very sad loh.. no money for today.. hengz i brought extra $4 today.. if not.. die!! forget it.. just treat it as i bought something today.. =.= DLE lecture was not fun.. i really dont like the lecturer!! she was talking like a rushing train today.. she doesnt want to put the notes up in MeL and scolded us for copying slow.. i was so angry with her that i gave up on copying notes.. being slow in copying.. i was really so pissed off kays.. she moving everything up so fast and the class is already complaining.. she still commented that we are what so ever to copy everything.. =.=
oh ya i was clumsy and i admit it.. yesterday i fell on my knee at the lecture hall stairs.. and thus my knee cap hurts!!! terribly hurt.. and being forgetful i didnt apply anything to it.. and today it became a "baruku"!!! wah kaoz.. swollen lah.. and walk also pain.. clumsy me!! arghz!!
arghz!! how come nothing seems to be smooth for me recently?? feeling very fustrated and sad about it lah.. assignments are like mountain now.. my weeks are packed even during holidays.. what the.. assignments and assignments.. nothing else.. can i have days of freedom and peace?? i doubt so.. hating everything.. haish.. feeling a little useless in everything.. i cant make things go well.. call me a loser or what so ever.. nobody cares i guess.. I AM DUMB!!
tomorrow date i think is much or less cancel.. jazz didnt comfirm with me.. others coming to me asking whether we confirm going.. but forget it.. whatever i wish for never going to come true.. i shall be a good ger tomorrow i guess.. come back home after lecture at 2pm and rot.. forget it!!! haish!!
VON .. i same like you mah, last time after i no more schooling i oso everyday alone at home , although at that time i don'tlike the feeling of being alone.. but you know.. that time itotal stayed @ home for whole 2 years?? only except some special date when you all free n those day we celebrate birthday ..
i oso can go thru that alone .. so you oso must learn...everyone can't be with you for 24hr.. only yourself can ..you don't have to feel worry or feel unsafe ... because no peoplewill forget you.. just that everyone have their own life with different people & thing to busy with .. so you oso must learn to take it easy !!!
being alone can let you grow more mature in thinking .. i never lieyou.. i used to have bad temper but ever since i always alone no people let me scold , my temper now is under my control!! i'vebecome more happy go lucky too.. and i treasurez every meeting more
:D don't worry ok.. i'm still waiting the chancez for the 2 ofus go out together.. so don't forget me ah!! jiayou ok!!
~*+ Rain.dropz +*~
REPLY TO RAIN
dearie!! i just saw your message and i decided to post a new blog just for you.. i thank you for everything.. i might be a little childish and unreasonable at times.. but you will always be there when i need you.. you care a lot i noe too.. i lurv our sistership and everything.. i treasure it too..
i noe sometimes i do make you angry and sad.. but you noe i didnt do that on purpose.. reason being i am stubborn at times too.. you always forgive whatever i do.. i shall thank you once again.. to me.. i am like a little ger with you always protecting me.. i noe you will always protect me too.. you make me feel i am like a princess surrounded by everything.. such as a wonderful ger.. you never leave me when i need you..
i noe i have been creating a little niusance this few days.. cause of this lonliness it actually kill me.. i dont feel the secure and bond inside me.. you will always tell me that it will be alright soon.. i noe it will cause you will guide me along..
i noe i am selfish.. i need de things is a lot.. i need lurv i need secure i need assurance.. maybe because i still dont have someone lurv to cover all this.. that why i really need my frenz de.. i am someone who is living in a world of my own.. i want things i wish for to happen.. i always tried my best to let it happen.. but it always dont.. haish.. i am sorry once again if i make you worry.. i promise that i will pick myself up soon and be that cheerful ger you always wish for..
i am still trying my best to put your date in with me.. i lurv our date.. hopefully i can date you during my holidays.. =)) once again thankie my dearie!!
lurv
yvonne
i think my lesson wasnt quite up to standard bah.. but mentor didnt say anything.. i think i need to jia you again for next week.. hmm.. went back to school and had my lunch with bestie.. and bestie is kind enough to buy me something.. she told me "i bought you a winnie the pooh de keychain cause you say you lonely" awww~~ issnt that so sweet?? she gave me a pooh to accompany me when i am lonely.. that so sweet of her kays.. thankie ger.. lurv ya.. ))
took some photo of my pooh.. i have already hang it on my hp.. and it shall be with me forever.. =))went back to causeway point to wash photo.. and met up with weeling serene lihui gary and jazzreel.. didnt stay long with them cause was rather tired after a long hours today.. so before i go we took photo.. =)) i miss them loads loads kays.. and my RSS teachers and frenz.. when will i get to see everyone again?? haish.. it seems difficult kays.. hmm..
after that went home and daddy was kind enough to allow me to make one spectacles.. i got mine.. and it was a purple one.. i lurv it man.. haha.. degree didnt increase and i was shock.. the person initially thought i got a little shan guang.. but ended up is just a funny things.. but alright i am great i dont have cause if have will have a difficult problem in buying lenses in school.. =.=
assignments rushing is a bad thing i ever want.. it seems like none is anxious about tomorrow activity.. whiteboards are not enough.. ppt not ready.. wah piangz.. i was feeling so stress again.. haish.. log book wasnt complete.. evaluation havent start.. what the hell!! monday is always the most busy day of the week.. stressful too!! haish..
i think a lot today.. but i guess everything will be over soon bah.. cause i pray hard to the god to let me be free of all this.. i thank them if i can be happy and cheerful again.. let me grieve for just a few more hours.. hopefully i am fine by tomorrow.. =))
rain gave me a link.. wah kaoz.. totally very very true.. i am someone who really live in fairyland.. i always think of things which people say are not true but i will say it is true.. haha.. nevermind.. i shall put down the link and view it if you like.. =)) http://appastro.qq.com/cgi-bin/astro_pwd?month=09&day=05 take a look if you want to noe more about me.. haha..
when will i be cheerful again??
i woke up late today.. last night wasnt able to sleep.. turning left and right when i was trying to sleep.. thus i miss my huan zhu ge ge for the first 10mins.. LOL!! nevermind.. i had a nice tearing while i was watching.. true enough that watching a sad show will make a person tears and i am one of them.. truely very touching indeed..
went to causeway point alone.. got no choice and had to print out my lesson plan for tomorrow and photocopy the design.. i got no choice that i have to go.. feeling was damn miserable kays.. i dont really like.. haish.. nevermind.. i think it is time for me to learn le bah.. =) i took an hour to stroll at causeway point.. strolling aimlessly kays.. went to library.. search for the storybook that can teach value.. but hor.. i cant find any.. so i went home.. reached home only mummy scold.. she said i never call back to ask whether need buy anything.. wah piangz.. she also didnt ask me to buy anything.. so dumb kays.. like that also get scolding.. arghz!!
online for a while then xinyi sweetie came to disturb in msn.. but wasnt in the mood.. so i didnt really talk to her.. was looking at my blog tag.. haish.. so many things happened.. then leen bestie was talking to me.. through my chattie.. hmm.. what she said really make sense.. when a person go out to the workplace.. the person will be alone.. but haish many things are beyond our control.. hmm.. i really dont wish to be alone.. dont want to be alone.. i want many many company.. i want them.. haish.. why why why.. nothing seems to be pleasing me.. i am a stupid ger kays..
i was msn-ing with my cousin.. then she recently just got her webcam.. so we were like playing like siao lah.. she also taught me how to cook my gui lin gao.. i shall do it next week.. then my nephew xiangfeng came over too.. i had a good laugh when i saw him.. his action is so funny.. then i show him the pink colour car which belongs to my didi.. he saw le he so happy and kept asking my cousin to take for him.. when i put the car away he kept crying like mad.. car appear he stopped crying.. issnt he cute?? last night also.. he was kissing the camera all day long lah.. cause i asked him to kiss me.. he is so sweet can.. sometimes he really make my day.. i miss him lot lot.. nevermind saturday ah ma bdae will be my day of happiness.. i shall be seeing my 4 lovely ones.. i miss xuan xuan a lot kays.. she is cute!! =))
alright nevermind.. xiao jiu mu they all came over to my house at 5plus.. then we headed down to foodfair at around 6pm.. so many people kays.. and people are pushing and stepping on your legs.. wah lau.. pain loh.. they never see de leh.. then somemore i was wearing my sandals.. arghz.. shouldnt wear that.. and so dumb lah.. got one person shouting in front of people ears saying excuse me.. what the hell.. and people are blocking in front of us.. and she just shouted like that.. wah piangz.. crazy lah.. arghz!! when a person wasnt in a good mood.. dont step on her tail.. i stared at the person loh.. i never did that before kays!! so angry can!!!
took some photos with my cousin minyi and a kangaroo at foodfair.. that kangaroo so cute kays.. he noe i want to take his picture he even post for me.. then xiao jiu mu asked me to take with the kangaroo.. but kinda weird kays.. hmm..
today mood still wasnt good.. haish.. i need a talk.. haish.. my heart pumping very very fast.. i couldnt think.. tomorrow lesson is posing a big worry inside me.. i feeling scared.. it will be an assessment by my mentor.. i feeling very very worry.. damn worry kays.. i dont noe if i can pass this assessment.. although i still got a lesson on 4 june.. i am still worry.. haish..
i dont want to be alone.. i want all my darlings back to me.. i want them.. i really miss them.. i miss them out of sudden.. i cried when i think.. where are you my sweetie darlings.. i need you all.. *sobx sobx*
i need assurance once again.. i feeling a little unsecure.. i had a bad experience.. where can i have my assurance?? haish.. i feel sad and bad.. i want cry out loud loud!!!!
will heaven hear my prayer??
today i did my lesson once again with my godsis.. but the timing like sure will be very long too.. because i am taking 2 groups.. that why i cant extend more time.. but actually i can right?? one group 30mins.. which means my whole lesson for 2 groups will be 70mins.. kinda long right.. so i cant.. at most only 60mins.. haish.. so i am rather worry that monday will be again a slow one.. haish.. and this time my mentor will be assessing me.. haish..*worry* i noe my mentor is nice but being teacher i must be up to standard too.. hopefully everything will be well bah..
took some photos when they are doing the art pieces.. it turn out to be a nice one.. but mummy commented that aileen one look like hua lian mao.. cause she used the 3 colours which are blue red and yellow on the face.. cute kays.. that how kids nowadays.. creative!! and they do whatever they like.. =D i had fun looking at them making the doll..
after that they went home straight cause they need to go to her grandfather's house.. so didnt have a chance to play with them.. but soon.. cause they already having their holidays.. haha.. oh ya.. steven uncle de new car coming this tuesday.. woohoo!!! so shiok!! heex.. i cant wait to sit his car and go out.. haha.. i will have chance soon.. cause i am going genting!! i shall get my rice hp chain again.. i dont care.. mine already spoilt so i shall have one again.. =))i am feeling moody today.. should say start from yesterday bah.. i tears 3 times yesterday kays.. recently i am getting a little more and more crybaby.. haish.. i didnt cry in the past de loh.. maybe now i need to cry so that this is to cover last time never cry de.. wah weird lah.. simple things make me cry.. yesterday i tears and cindy saw.. she also shock.. but i cant control.. then when i was inside 960 heading home.. my eyes filled with tears.. then it drop down.. luckily i was at the back not much people.. then at home.. i tears inside my room.. when want go to sleep also tears.. then ended up couldnt sleep.. slept at only 3plus.. didnt sleep well too.. morning woke up headache.. then hen xing ku kays.. today whole day didnt really laugh.. only smile.. even i watch the funny show also no use.. my didi is laughing like mad when he is watching the zhou ri ba dian dang.. i was like huh what the hell.. haish.. mood not good also very xing ku kays.. arghz.. life isnt peaceful..
where are those who i need them now.. i need them real bad.. i scold myself dumb.. i hate myself.. come to think of a lot of things.. i was thinking.. if i didnt change my primary school when i was primary 3 i wouldnt get into RSS then.. no more rain dearie.. then there will be no kuku family for me.. and no more my close and cheerful pals in secondary school.. if i managed o get into another school.. i might be dont noe where.. maybe right now i already waiting for university life.. cause i might go JC that time if i score well.. if i dont have the passion for kids.. right now i wouldnt be in ECH and wouldnt get to noe eileen bestie and my sotong family which is name after a blur sotong like me.. furthermore.. if i never join astro with shuling.. i wouldnt fall in lurv and i wouldnt get to noe xinyi sweetie.. things might not be what it should be right now.. how i wish i stay in the past.. when rain dearie and i would always go out together.. take neoprints together whereby only we 2.. i miss those time.. i also miss the time when my sotong family get together and can you imagine.. it had been half a year since my sotong family last gathering.. when will it be?? although it wasnt long i went out wit xinyi sweetie.. but things change kays.. she is busy with everything and i am busy with everything.. i dont have time.. dont have time for everyone.. haish.. i still miss all my frenz..
i may be free sometimes.. but when i am free none is free.. when i am not free.. everyone asking me when i am free.. what the.. haish.. i need a serious talk.. a very very serious de talk.. i am emo cause of this.. none will forgive me.. haish.. dont bother about me bah.. let me rot here kays.. =)
today lesson ended at around 11am.. actually having AW tutorial at 2pm but it was shifted to 12noon and those class which not having tutorial today will be excused.. so being the only one dont noe what to do.. i decided to not go for that tutorial.. initially plan was to have our lunch then proceed to our SAM activity discussion.. but it didnt go very well.. everything was cancelled.. so we went to play games for a while.. but everyone was tired.. so we didnt stay long.. we went off at around 1plus..
some random photos when we were playing uno tacho.. wah kaoz.. it always fall when it was my turn!! so suay can.. then was like shouting and laughing like mad.. the people sitting near us must be thinking we are crazy.. haha.. but i had a good laugh kays!!
okay fine i didnt noe where to go after everything.. i called up everyone and none is free.. okay loh.. initially staying at clubhouse to help shuling to clean up but i was very restless and so i didnt stay.. went home alone.. not noe-ing what i should do to kill time.. so i took a super long bus home.. on bus was thinking quite a lot.. rain dearie was sms-ing me.. and she was shock that i was alone.. too bad she cant come out cause she wasnt free.. nevermind then.. i went causeway point alone.. imagine!! i went alone kays!!! i was strolling there not noe-ing what i need to buy and do.. wanted to go library but decided not to.. went to pasar malam stroll around again but it was far tooo humid inside.. so went back causeway point.. loitering everywhere i could.. buy things needed for lesson on monday and making cards.. now i finally noe loitering around in shopping centre can kill one person kays.. so i decided to go home when it was around 4pm.. reached home do nothing.. online online online.. no one there too.. what the point man...
okay i shall say everything before i decided to go MIA for days.. i need to stay alone.. somewhere in my heart there is a line which make me lose faith in everything.. how come when i need people no one is there.. i am feeling a little not okay!! i hate everything now!!! really hate it.. haish.. i am losing to the world.. losing terribly!! i dont noe is it my thinking or what.. when i am alone my mind start to wonder.. wonder to different world which no one will noe it went to.. i want to boat quay man.. if i am a little bit more daring.. maybe now i already heading there sitting there listening to my heart beat.. but i am not.. staying at home seems boring.. nothing seems to make me feel better.. i vent my sadness on my bears.. they will feel the pain too kays.. ha ha ha.. tomorrow shall be a day for yvonne to reflect and think.. okay fine.. i shall go away and miss me people.. =))
i miss my frenz suddenly.. i realised how important they are to me.. ha ha ha.. but sometimes you dont seems important to them.. they treat you and you treat them differently.. so we cant possible be selfish.. i need to learn liao.. learn everything on my own.. i fall down i have to learn to pick up myself.. okay fine.. let me just be emotic for a while.. once i have my next posting.. i will be fine again.. alright people.. give me a call or sms kays.. i will be waiting.. =))
look up the sky and i only saw clouds..where is my stars which bright up my road??
DLE tutorial was a no no to me.. i couldnt listen to what she said.. and mind you it is an exam module.. gosh!!! i cant imagine.. how i wish my actual lecturer is back soon!! i praying for her arrival.. haish.. the way the current lecturer presented her slide was totally a no no too.. i cant see the words below and copy.. plus she had a lot of things inside for us to copy.. she once promised to put on mel.. but she didnt.. wah angry lah.. then my notes is like so messy.. and you noe lah i this person cannot stand untidy notes de.. and she made me going to recopy the notes again.. haish.. and most lecture i didnt copy.. gosh!!! how am i going to survive in this module.. wah piangz.. =((
having 4 hours break doing nothing.. actually got lah.. me and leen bestie went to search for books for making cards and our art and craft lesson.. i found something so interesting.. haha.. going to plan that for my second and third lesson.. hopefully it pass bah.. =)) AW lecture was going through citation again.. and i listen in class kays.. so now i noe how to do quotation also.. so i changed most of the things that were inside my reflection.. haha.. but i am still confuse in do referencing for internet source.. gosh!!! haish.. =((
i guess this shall be it.. next tuesday will be my group SAM activity le.. feeling quite stress about it.. cause i am assigned as the narrator.. oh my god!! i am scared!!! haish.. monday still got assessment by my mentor.. oh my!!! i scared!! if i fail this assessment how sia.. i dont noe.. wah i cant imagine.. haish.. worry worry worry!!!! i pray hard for everything to end fast!!
tomorrow mummy will be going out with godsis and family to see steven uncle new colour.. they are going to choose the colour.. how i wish i also can go loh.. =0 nevermind i will get to see the new car soon.. haha.. i will be going genting in this new car too.. yippee!! i shall enjoy myself first then second week of holiday i will need to rush assignments le.. wah first week of school tuesday to friday also have to hand in assignments.. gosh.. after doing SAM report next week.. i will need to start on a lot of assignments liao.. group one individual one.. wah.. i am stress liao lah!! everyday people around me telling me assignments assignments!! gosh.. one day i will be kill by all this assignments!!!!
haish.. i am a pig kays!!! i have finally learnt my lesson now!!! NO MORE SUDDEN WORK FOR YVONNE!!! haish.. i wei le this i cried again.. so dumb can!! but i got no choice.. i worried until i cried till very jia lat.. my tears was like dropping non-stop can.. then out of which xinyi called.. so bo bian didnt answer her call.. waited for a while then called her back.. haish.. i have to learn to trust liao cause i got no other choices.. parents dont allow me to go to her house now and print out everything then cab home.. even i stayed at her house also cannot.. haish.. i dont noe what to do lah!!! arghz!!!! i am at a lost again.. HAISH!!!
took some photos when playing games.. this hammer is winnie the pooh de kays!! but a little out of shape!! haha..
yvonne what are you doing?? hitting leen with a hammer!! leen please hide!! haha..
this is me and nicole.. she cut her hair again!! so style kays!! haha..
after that went for a break at the library.. i ate my ham sandwich which i bought to school.. i made one for leen bestie and one for xinyi sweetie.. but they very bad.. they said that later eat le stomachache!! arrrr~~ they are bad people kays!! next time dont give them nice nice food.. haha.. *evil smile* wahoho~~ xinyi sweetie went to childcare today.. and she got the K1.. haha.. she havent tell me everything.. waiting for her to come back.. she still not home yet.. haish..
when going for FM tutorial.. leen bestie and cindy were talking about the issue that our AW lecturer told us last friday.. think of it my hair stands kays!! i was so scared.. when we reached the 6th floor i dont dare to go in.. then when we went in i was the last.. out of sudden i shouted and leen bestie thought what.. i squeezed my way in the middle.. but they pushed me to the front and i am scared too.. so i squeezed back to the middle.. was rather fighting space with bizhen.. she dumb lah she knew i was scared.. but just want to fight.. =.= then after FM tutorial.. stupid bridget and huishan.. they suddenly popped out from the back and shouted ah.. i xia dao.. i screamed lah!!! -_____- so DUMB!!!!
DLE lecture was a angry one.. got so angry lah.. why issit that whatever we choose cannot one.. and some people are just dumb.. arghz!! we need to set up learning corners for our lecture as there is a ger who want to film our lesson.. and it will be show on tv durin end of june or early july.. but this is so last minutes.. everyone is fighting for the corners.. in the end we got the writing corner.. we planned out everything and started doing.. out of the sudden.. the lecturer came over and said why were we separated from the reading corner.. and we actually went over to the people there and asked if they would like to move over as there were space beside us.. they rejected.. so we continued.. but the lecturer just want us to move.. we had NO choice just to move.. and she still asked why are we located next to the dramatic corner as dramatic corner is noisy corner while ours is quiet.. we got nothing to say.. she asked us to shift and then in return she asked this question.. and people from reading corner simply refuse to move.. the lecturer still told us to say that we over look the problem.. what the hell.. so in the end we hack care.. we rushed for everything and finally everything was done up.. had the different interview.. and worse is.. the ger had to leave and our group is the last group.. no more filming.. so we also hack care but was rather angry.. the lecturer purposely skip our group.. wah kaoz.. was really angry.. but what to do.. she worried that people might question her back.. angry!!!
but i was happy we our corner.. we think everything and did it all up.. =)) good job gers!! you all are the best.. we also did a good job for our learning corners!! =D some pictures of our corners..
and you noe what!! that intruder stuck onto our wet paint.. and when weisian and nicole shift the labels up a bit.. it began to fly.. flying round the class.. and you noe.. yvonne is scared of all this.. so i squat down while all the others were standing and making everything.. after a while.. the lecturer asked our group to present but didnt film lah.. then i was sitting there.. then that intruder FLY DIRECTLY TO MY FACE!! and being a timid person and scared of all these.. i became very scared.. i keep shaking my head to prevent the intruder to stop on me.. i was hugging tightly to cindy hands can!! OH MY GOD!! then qingling was saying the ger is filming.. OMG!!!!!!!! worse!!!! dui nian!!! ahhhhh~~~~ nevermind forget it.. think of it jiu pa..took pictures after we set up the learning corner.. we are cool kays!! heeeexxx..
just now i was changing my blogskin.. and i finished changing everything and was about to press save.. but who noes.. i press the search button instead.. and everything gone!!! maddie lah.. i got so angry with myself.. then i started complaining to leen bestie.. she still asked me to jia you.. =.= arrr~~ nevermind.. i still finished everything and get a new skin for myself.. haha.. =D
stress in everything and i need a rest soon!!
went to school straight after attachment.. initially thought can meet leen bestie at bus stop then headed to library together.. i wasnt hungry during that time.. so i was waiting for leen bestie at the bus stop.. saw qiuwen.. chat with her but soon her bus came and she left.. was sitting alone till lingkwee and roysten came over and she offered me tibits.. i ate it without thinking of my sore throat.. wahaha.. xinyi sweetie came with ah xue after that but i didnt talk to her much soon her bus came liao.. she was heading to woodlands library.. later qingling called whether want to have lunch.. so i went over and i began to feel a little hungry.. so i went to atrium with qingling and bridget and huishan to eat lunch.. i had butter rice.. it was delicious!! yummy!! first time eating also.. LOL~
went for CD2.1 class after lunch.. today was the last lecture for my current lecturer.. quite sad cause her lesson always fill of laughter.. i lurv those videos she gave us see.. haish.. i will miss her de!!! =)) after lesson went back to woodlands library to find xinyi sweetie.. she was still searching for her articles!! wah imagine so long lah.. next year will be my turn!! gosh.. nevermind i take everything from her jiu hao.. wahaha.. after that i finally found a book for my MAYC assignment.. thanks god!! i shall do everything tomorrow.. give myself a little rest today after a tough day at centre.. hoho..
a lot of thoughts came in to my mind after talking to rain dearie.. she was talking about a particular thing.. haha.. i shall not go into relationship with those people bah.. but i guess if it has to come it will eventually come.. so no choice.. haha.. and i was telling xinyi sweetie that i will never get into a relationship.. but can i?? haha.. i doubt my own words too!! i still ke wang for the care and romantic during a relationship.. but how long will i be waiting?? i never noe.. people close to me are all attach.. haha.. nevermind yvonne is still happy with what she is having now.. she dont ask for more.. =D
later 1plus godsis came liao and both of them helped me with my art lesson which is for tomorrow.. it went off quite smoothly.. aileen doesnt really has the ideas what to do.. she was tearing the paper until so big.. but luckily it turned out to be nice.. haha.. just the both of them it was already 30mins.. so i wondered whether 20minutes for the children will it be tooo short?? hmm.. maybe cause aileen and annabelle were both doing it very slowly or what.. but hopeflly tomorrow will be fine bah.. =)) please bless me with all the luck for tomorrow!! i will need a lot of luck.. jia you yvonne!!!
took some photos when both of them were doing the activity.. random shots again.. =D
this art piece is aileen de.. so cute right.. there is a white patch below the shirt.. i ask her "why is there a white patch?? you dont want to cut it away mah??" she replied "this one is the skirt that rubber.. see same like my one.." wah.. isnt she adorable.. she jing ran still can think of that.. haha.. that was her princess ger.. she drew a crown for that ger too.. haha..
this is annabelle art piece.. her drawing was a little not portion but still it was okays.. look nice too.. my brother commented that aileen one is muscular ger while annabelle one is skinny women and funny.. haha.. but both have their own uniqueness kays!!
after that they went home as they wanted to go east coast park to cycle.. i didnt go cause i need to complete all the stuffs.. wah.. was rather busy typing everything inside lappie and sent it to all the people.. but somehow.. things made me feeling a little upset and angry.. i dont even noe what i did wrong.. i dont want to do those things you said means i am giving excuses.. you just quarrelled with me for such a small incident.. wah you are great.. like this also can quarrel.. i am dumb kays!!! out of which when you scolded me i felt the hurt.. i dont even noe why i felt that hurt inside.. fine i guess both of us need to think about it.. maybe you were right that i am giving excuses but you noe why.. but i am really busy working with my school stuffs.. just a matter of whether you will listen or not.. if you choose not to listen so i got nothing to say.. you made me upset.. whatever is always your words.. i am not wrong this time.. you dont believe me.. okay loh.. forget it kays!! ignore me for the rest of your life.. i will appreciate it.. =))
i am a strong ger.. i will not going to be soft hearted anymore.. it had been long since i last quarrelled with you.. nevermind.. i going to listen to xinyi sweetie that i should not go and hong you.. should be another way round.. you made me angry not i.. so let's be fair.. =))
okay nevermind.. dont want to care much too.. just now during dinner.. a cat came inside my house and both my daddy and mummy shouted ae.. i was shocked lah cause i was inside kitchen washing the dishes.. wah i ran out with soap on my hands to see what happened.. i saw the cat!!! soooo... i ran back in again.. i am scared kays!!! daddy was trying very hard to shoo that cat out of the house.. daddy closed the door and prevent that cat from coming in again.. like so funny lah cause it had been long since a cat came into my house.. lolx.. but i hope they dont come cause i am scared!! haha.. and it had been weeks since i changed my crayfish prince de water.. so finally today after mummy nagging.. i changed the water.. and now it was fresh!!! haha.. he should be feeling happy now bah.. haha..
mummy boiled some sore throat de chinese medicine for me.. wah so sour and nan he kays!! i never going to make myself sick again.. so er xin kays.. i complaint to mummy saying very nan he leh.. mummy scolded me said she didnt ask me to eat those fried food.. lolx.. so dumb.. haha.. then mummy also boiled liang cha for whole family.. in the end i drank so much.. just to pray that tomorrow i will be fine.. heex..
i need a shoulder with me to let me cry out loud
MAYC lesson we went outdoor.. haha.. we had some classification games.. and i finally saw those children from the caterpilla cove.. they are so adorable kays!! haha.. then we went round the school searching for items that belong to red colour.. haha.. and we had mini games in class guessing.. hoho.. then after lecture went to SIM for lunch.. initially waiting for xinyi sweetie to pass me the sandwiches but she was late and furthermore she put both the sandwiches for me and maxine together.. so she said to pass me after her lesson.. then i was so sick that i couldnt finish the food.. partly was cause i was high.. xinyi is being send to the same attachment centre as me.. hehe.. initally she is being send to yishun de.. but now.. she is with me.. i am so high!! heex.. i can see her every monday.. yippee!!!
during AW tutorial.. so many people join in for the tutorial.. wah.. then still okay.. didnt listen to him talking.. but i got very cold when he said something not nice.. i was scared.. i was grabbing onto leen bestie hands.. and she was laughing like mad.. crazy!!! lesson ended and we had to walk all the way in for the next class which was SCV.. wah kaoz.. he didnt say those story still okay.. he said le i got so timid and scared!! and went to SCV class then bridget xia si wo.. she suddenly shouted and i nearly cried.. haish.. oh ya.. they made me feel scared too before that.. they left me alone in the toilet.. i forget which day was it.. bridget held onto the door so tight that i pulld very hard to open.. i was tearing and laughing together.. wah piangz.. i am timid kays!! stop scaring me!! i will die of heart problems de..
SCV was having a mini debate session.. everyone got so agitated during the questions time.. wah.. siao man.. haha.. but it was really funny kays!! hoho!! some photos were taken randomly..
after SCV lesson.. went off straight and it was rather early.. we took the same lift together and everyone went off together.. so scary kays!! initially going to clubhouse to see if there is anything i need to do before i went off but in the end sockping also release class le.. so we met at the canteen and went to parkmall after that.. took bus there and meet up with jasper they all at the entrance of plaza singapura.. went to parkmall sakae together.. we had lot of laughter there.. but the food served was kinda slow.. talking non-stop and laughing non-stop.. haha.. but it ws kinda not zhi de.. cause i only ate around 6 or 7 plates and i was full.. watching cheng boon and yuan man eating.. hoho.. took some photos of those plates and stuffs that we had.. haha..
after dinner.. we wanted to play pool.. but it was full we went for other but it was under renovating.. so we decided to go and play arcade.. had a lot of fun there.. jingkun was rather funny when he was playing.. haha.. cant stop laughing at him man.. oopsie.. hahaha.. oh ya.. i bumped onto the machine cause i didnt noe got something popping out.. and it hit against my head!! damn pain lah.. until today also pain.. so stupid!! after that took MRT home and walked all the way home from MRT.. walking very fast and feeling a little uneasy.. didnt dare to look back.. all i could do is to look on the floor and stop thinking.. haha.. finally i reached home safe and sound.. =))today we went out to celebrate my dearie rain de birthday.. initially meeting rain dearie at 10.50am de.. but she told me not to go out until she said so.. so i waited.. and i continued doing her card.. cause initally i thinking of giving it to her only on monday during her actually bdae..
but since i could finish it on time.. so i gave it to her today.. haha.. here a picture of what i have made for her.. =))
in the end i was late and she was waiting for me.. haha.. i only started to get change and everything when she sms me she was already out.. hoho.. so she was waiting for me for about half an hour i guess.. really very soon cause the bus was going fast.. haha.. then went to yishun to meet stella kuku.. we went toilet and they were both doing some touch up and styling.. soon yvette jie came and we spent very long in the toilet.. we only went off at 3plus and headed down to bugis.. haha.. halfway at somerset jiabao came.. and we met her at city hall.. then we went seoul garden.. wah quite a lot of people.. we went in at 3,30pm and we left at 7plus.. haha.. so long right.. cause we were talking and eating at the same time.. taking pictures too.. hoho..
after dinner-ing at seoul garden we went to take neoprint.. haha.. i lurv taking neoprint kays!! heex.. so pretty de us.. haha.. but i dont have it now so couldnt post it up.. after which we walked to suntec city then to millenia walk to have TCC drink.. it was such a pleasant walk with everyone around me.. they are great!! =DD was at the fountain of wealth.. watched the water thingy for awhile then went down to basement and saw a guy holding onto the flowers.. my mind was telling me someone is going to propose.. so indeed.. words started to appear at the water there stating what "i love you will you marry me" issit it romantic and sweet?? i guess that ger agree ba.. didnt stay and watch.. if the person is me.. i will cry and hug him tight to agree.. haha.. thinking too much i guess.. =X okay reached TCC and we had drinks.. wedges too.. after which got cakes.. mango dont noe what and tiramisu.. worse is they said that tiramisu got wine taste but i didnt taste the wine.. all i tasted was the chocolate.. i didnt got drunk kays.. haha.. some random photos.. heex.. i enjoyed myself man.. it had been long seen i had so much laughter.. =))
we also took photos together.. some were inside yvette jie camera.. she havent send it to me.. but nevermind i wait patiently for it.. =DD below is one nice photo which i like.. we took it when we were at millenia walk de toilet.. preparing to go off.. so sweet can.. my kuku family rox kays!! haha.. we also had a lot of laughter on the way home.. some crazy things ar.. haha.. laugh until i become no yi tai.. maddie lah.. hoho..
this is my kuku family photo.. where is zhiying and mike keno?? haha.. missing in action!!
yvette jie and yvonne mei.. nice and yummy strawberry kays!!
my dearie rain and me!! i lurv her lot lot.. she is my birthday ger kays!! =DD
i am sick!! i confirm i am sick.. i shall rest early and recharge myself before monday arrive.. jia you for my first lesson bah!!! i noe xinyi will help me jia you too.. i am waiting for her to come to my centre and i will no longer having the fear cause she make me feel save.. =))
i need to be lurv too!! will you join me for lurv??
after quiz we got nearly an hour so we discussed our SCV debate.. wah i am dead.. i cant debate.. and they going to let teacher choose the speaker.. oh my god!! i will be the one dieing i can confirm.. she sure yvonne.. wah die die.. i pray hard!!! *praying hard* was rather restless today cause i only slept at 2.15am yesterday night and i woke up at 5.30am!! wah imagine.. how sleepy i am today.. gosh.. all because of what i did yesterday and made me feeling guilty and talked to xinyi for sooo long.. yawnz!!
during break time.. bestie leen wanted to eat wu don but i somehow saying that we need to discuss SAM evaluation.. and thus we didnt go.. sorry bestie leen that you cant eat wu don today.. =(( okay nevermind everything went on very fast and we got nothing to do after that.. board games corner was close for some meeting and we were sitting there doing nothing.. haish.. quite sad.. wasnt really noe why.. called up xinyi sweetie again.. we chatted until somehow something happened and we ended the call.. hmm..
but later everything is fine again.. we had fun playing games.. so fun!! was laughing like mad when playing snortax.. so fun kays!! i am getting a little faster then usual.. haha.. so good.. had a fun time playing and relaxing too.. =D
after that went for AW lecture.. i was very very angry!!! i sms xinyi sweetie but she didnt reply me.. so i swollen my anger.. i control kays.. i was telling bestie leen and she knew it too.. gosh!!! cant one person has their own style?? why whatever we do sure got someone at the back copying you?? arghz.. angry!! when reached home jiu tell xinyi sweetie.. she said someone copied your work because your work is nice.. but i dont like!! i just cant stand it.. she told me that i should tell that person and not her mah.. but hor i dont noe leh.. tell her got use mah?? wondering.. okay nevermind yvonne will be okay after venting her anger at her doll doll.. haha.. so violet.. oopies..
went home with ting ting.. tell her a lot of things cause she is my regular blog reader.. she knew a lot of things too.. haha.. so was talking to her how i was feeling.. she listened to me.. so nice right.. but hor.. she very bad!! she bullied me before AW lecture.. not good.. kick her away.. haha.. =X
okay! i am confirm sick again.. during AW lecture bridget was passing the tibits and i had some and realised i got a dry throat suddenly.. i feeling very xing ku.. drink lot of water but i only left very little.. didnt bother to refill.. went home medicine finished.. and i am now suffering.. gosh!! help!! i having sushi tomorrow and seoul garden on saturday!! wah.. die die.. haish..
i miss you when will you come??
this is weisian de garfield.. yvonne de baby doll and bestie leen de dale.. =))
this is bestie leen de dale and yvonne de baby doll.. they are loving kays!!
bestie and me.. actually got one more weisian de.. but sorry ar my hands short.. haha.. so only manage to capture me and bestie.. oops.. sorry weisian.. and our doll too.. haha..after class we went to seoul garden at causeway point to celebrate huishan bdae.. got me bestie qingling shuling cindy weisian nicole nicole's bf huishan and bridget.. wah so fun kays.. but ate a lot.. then became very full.. i didnt cook today.. haha.. cindy cook for me sia.. she kept put food on my plate.. =.= then had a lot of fun kays.. laughter and giggles.. haha..
then we had a little surprise for huishan.. she went toilet with bridget and shuling then we quickly bring out the cake.. we sang birthday song for her.. loud loud one kays!! haha.. this is fun.. with sooo many people!! then took pictures again.. but nicole havent send me.. nicole ar.. send me kays.. haha.. =D
me and weisian.. we stand under the light so that we can become "bright bright".. heex..
me and qingling.. she wear very pretty today kays!! =))after that rushed back to school for astro meeting.. wah today meeting so chaotic.. then i dont noe what i should write for my minutes.. gosh.. i was asking chuxiang and he asked me to record down next time go home slowly listen.. mad lah.. then i really stuck sia.. gosh.. a bad secretary instead!! haha..
something make me a little unhappy.. she making me mad and sad at the same time.. i dont noe.. but i dont wish she stay in this way.. i wanted to scold.. but i didnt.. but i sounded a little fierce when i sms her.. she was asking whether i am angry..i wasnt.. just a little fustrated with her.. that all.. but i cant do anything.. dennis said he will cheer me up.. but he himself is now very tiring.. dont wish to make him so tired.. so i told him to go to sleep and ignore me.. haish.. thinking a lot when i was in bus just now on the way home.. haish.. i had a lot to tell.. but everything just stop when i am about to open and say.. ah!!!! what should i do?? i am scared!!
our lecturer so called purposely organised this talk for our class because of the death of our dear frenz.. but it wasnt that good.. it made me feel down and people were all tearing around you.. and i really want to tears liao especially when we break up into groups and we were attached to one of the psychologist.. she made us to talk about everything.. i couldnt talk.. through out the whole session i kept very quiet.. i dont feel like saying anything.. bestie cried.. weisian cried.. and th psychologist was saying what can we do if another this incident happen.. i control kays.. i didnt tears when she asked this question.. but i sincerely pray that none of this will happen again.. i will break down really jia lat.. i cant take it.. even my family.. i cant take it.. i prayed hard for it not to happen again.. i began to worry.. i hide everything inside me.. no one noe happened except for me.. i seems to be enjoying myself during the time with my frenz but the hurt inside no one noe.. it is terrible.. i am lucky that i have a blog to vent out everything.. but certain things i couldnt say out.. i feel horrible.. i dont feel like talking but if i dont talk i will burst out.. what to do?? haish..
many things rushed to my brain during break time.. i didnt talk and i didnt smile.. i was keeping myself occupied by trying all the way to get my FM tutorial homework done.. i tried my best to teach bestie and explained everything to qingling.. hopefully i do help.. thursday will be FM quiz.. i got no confident.. i didnt study i didnt listen in class.. i hate studying out of the sudden.. usually i dont hate it.. but now i hate it.. i lost interest in everything.. in other words i lost faith.. haish.. trying very hard now.. but nothing seems to work.. haish..
it has been long since i last went out with sweetie darling xinyi.. i miss her!! but where is she?? she is busy with her assignment too.. haish.. dearie darling rain also busy at home watching show.. haish.. i miss my sweetie darling and my dearie darling.. haix.. bestie leen also becoming a little crazy with all lesson plan.. and i am turning mad!!! many many things to do.. but i simply got no mood in doing..
haish!!! 2BO1 is tyring very hard to get everyone together after this incident.. but it seems like we can do nothing.. but i believe everything will be smooth and fine for us.. i pray for it.. =)) i shall give a lovely smile for this.. i hope i get over everything soon.. but i cant.. i need to make myself busy.. fine this week will be a busy week for me.. i am not free everyday.. maybe like that then i will feel a little happier bah.. numbing myself.. ha ha ha~
as for sunday.. mummy mood was good!! i didnt chao her and i managed to rebond my hair.. she asked xiao jiu mu to bring me to the saloon she went.. haha.. so i got myself a bonus.. wahaha.. initially thinking i save money then go rebond de.. but since she yesterday so nice.. wahaha.. then that was the happiest day after all.. =DD
today i went childcare again.. and i did all my "first time".. haha.. i helped a child to clean up after she went toilet.. wah i was rather scared when she asked me to help her.. haha.. but i did help her in the end.. then i also took a class of 20 children for bathing.. i cant believed it myself too.. i actually bathed 20 children?!?! haha.. but was rather happy cause i got the experiences.. it wasnt the same as bathing my cousin last time when she was young and bathing xiangfeng.. totally different man haha.. but quite fun!! hoho..
then went for class.. was rather restless.. maybe cause yesterday didnt sleep properly bah cause rebond mah then pa sleep dao.. so didnt sleep well loh.. so dumb.. didnt listen in class.. partly also doing the things for lesson.. hmm.. haish.. after lesson i went to buy my CD2.1 textbook.. wah like finally.. haha.. mummy gave me money to buy also.. =))
okay lah recently mood trying very slowly to recover.. feeling a little happier than before.. =)) some little things still made me feeling sad.. friendship again!! i really dont noe what to do.. i still misses my secondary school pals.. they are still the best afterall.. cause they dont act as angels.. they talked straight face to face if they are not happy with one another.. we did get angry during projects time.. but we were frenz again.. maybe being 5years together with them made my bonding with them thicker bah.. althought we went different poly.. but we were still getting in contact with one another.. how come i cant have this kind of friendship when i went poly?? everything seems to change a lot.. haish.. dont noe issit my character change or what.. i was feeling a little dumb.. actually not a little.. is A LOT!!! i need help i guess.. but who will help me?? i dont noe..
my heart is always pumping fast.. i dont noe why.. it became so fast sometime which i find it difficult to breathe.. haish.. maybe because too many things are burdening me.. arrrrr~ i feeling miserable.. i need to get away this kinds of feeling before saturday!!! gosh.. and i still got a lot of things havent do!!! ahhhhhh~~~ my FP2.1 lesson plans... journal entries.. reflection.. and MAYC reflection.. gosh.. how to start?? i dont noe!!!
the sudden raining and thunderstorm made me think a lot.. i was not in myself.. things started flowing in my mind.. i remembered mummy once said when a person died and cant bear their families and frenz.. it will rain.. especially during the day when he/she was about to de bury or creminate(dont noe how to spell).. this was bad.. and i was totally scared.. is not i dont want to send her off the last journey but i just cant bear it.. furthermore it will be a more sadden-ing sight.. my heart break totally..
i was tearing under my blanket.. couldnt get into sleep.. finally i fall asleep at 7plus.. i thought everything will be fine once i woke up.. everything will be fine when i woke up.. but no.. i still couldnt accept the fact.. no one was at home today.. i didnt go lecture today too.. i couldnt concentrated.. haish.. hopefully i will be fine after this sunday.. =)) i cant stay at home.. once i at home my mind started to run everywhere.. haish..
so in the end.. i went BPP with bestie.. and i finally bought the sandals.. bestie also have one too.. we have same sandals!! =)) then we also walked around at BPP to search for our frenz birthday pressie.. we finally found some but she didnt find her mum pressie for mother's day.. we got ourselves a nail polish too.. i got a weird color which no one will think yvonne will get one.. haha.. bestie got herself one gold color.. we agreed to exchange our colors on tuesday.. =))
i am trying to let myself feel a little happier.. hopefully everything will be fine for me.. i still lurv the wonderful smiling me.. =D
friendship is another problem for me.. i dont understand certain things.. why people always see the surface?? i dont noe what i should do.. seeing my bestie feeling so sad.. i dont noe what i should do.. something i was thinking.. if i didnt get into ECH.. things might be different.. if i didnt get myself into lurv this issue.. maybe things are not going to be this way.. many many things will be different.. bestie wouldnt be feeling that sad.. =(( haish.. somehow thinking it was my fault.. really mine.. haish..
i want my guardian angel beside me.. i want them.. haix.. why everything so different now?? i want to cry but i control.. hopefully everything will be fine soon.. i hope i hope..
this is not something which we are happy about.. it makes one feels terrible that all i can say.. totally depress and upset.. no one imagine this to happen.. haish.. cried for so long last night and was feeling very sad.. couldnt get into sleep.. turning right and left dont noe what i should do.. i tried counting sheep hopefully it works.. but i still dont fall into my dreamland.. but i was heng that i finally get into sleep after crying so long.. but night was short.. i was frightened by my own dream.. it was a scary dream which i wouldnt forget.. when i opened my eyes i could see that scary ghost in front.. i freak out crying..
getting to class feeling very heavy.. couldnt listen in class.. but we were lucky that we had one understanding lecturer who cancelled his lecture for us.. tomorrow lecture is also being excuse for our class.. hopefully everyone get back to the mood of study soon..
was rather stoning when we pay respect to our frenz.. didnt noe what i should say.. hearing all the tearing sound made my heart sink.. i tears again.. mood was totally not good.. nothing was right.. haish.. =(
nevermind yvonne will be a strong ger.. she will always remember the wonderful memories she had once with her beloved frenz.. although she is gone.. but her picture will still be with us.. i pray hard that everything will be fine.. she too will bless us.. i just want to say.. we will miss you ger.. your memories will always be inside our heart..
feeling terrible.. where is my guardian angel?? i need them now.. really really!! i need to cry out loud.. i need to..
okay nevermind forget it.. cant stick the hair back liao.. i shall comb my hair everyday from 10am to 11am.. that is what xinyi told me.. she said comb during that time hair will grow faster.. *pray* haha.. erm today i had a busy day even though i was having a so call holiday.. busy reading notes for DLE.. doing the SAM de cards.. settling everything for astro nominal roll.. i thought i would do until very late.. but i was wrong lah.. by 4pm i done everything.. LOL~ then i started packing my room for those notes i always anyhow put.. sort it out one by one.. initially wanted to do all the lesson plans for arts and craft.. but i cant think of any.. i shall left it to weekends.. haha..
kinda feeling bad today.. yesterday night was chatting with xinyi over the phone till around 3plus in the morning.. i kept her talking until so late and she had to go for class at 8am today.. hmm.. she actually asked me to go marina square with her de.. but i didnt promise to go cause i worried i cant finished all the stuffs.. then feeling real bad dont noe how to express.. haish.. is like always whenever i need her to be with me she will always be there.. but now.. she need accompany but i wasnt there.. what a bad frenz i am.. not to her also.. to rain to eileen also.. so dumb.. i am a BAD frenz to others..
but i was relieved when i called her and someone was with her today.. at least now i noe she does not loiter at marina square not noe-ing where to go and what to do.. at least i bi jiao fang xin.. =)
many things are going to pile up soon.. things are like happening so fast.. i got no time to react man.. wah.. am i turning some kind of slow or what?? =.- is time for yvonne to rush her assignments again.. first assignment is MAYC reflection which is due on 25may.. but i havent start anything.. i dont noe what i should do.. haish.. worried a lot liao lah..
hmm.. rain said i bu shuo gui zhe?? what is it?? she didnt tell me.. rain~ dont ask me guess liao.. tell me.. so that i noe what i did wrong.. =(
today i reached school quite early but not as early as bestie leen.. haha.. as i was hungry i asked leen to go canteen 1 to buy my favourite da bao.. hehe.. and she had her japanese pancake.. so nice can!! and haha my breakfast was settled.. hehe.. yvonne is turning a little healthy cause she everyday will eat breakfast de kays.. please praise her for this too.. hoho.. but i wasnt quite pleased with certain people.. therefore i ended up going to class feeling a little bu shuang and angry!! i ren kays!! being a ger like me who doesnt like to be involve in any quarrels.. so i kept very quiet today.. hmm.. that should be what i am going to do next time i guess.. =)
SAM lecture was fun.. i was having fun playing around.. and i concluded that i wasnt a bestie to leen.. haha.. but she confirm is yvonne de bestie kays!! we were doing some kind of tests.. but i doesnt noe leen that well.. ended up got a few questions wrong.. haha.. leen is so clever.. she noe me inside out.. wahaha.. issnt she a nice bestie of mine?? hoho.. then lecturer also asked us to do some drawings.. she said to give the best for the drawings and gave it to someone special.. but mine was a little ugly so i intended to do it at home tomorrow.. hehe.. gotta bring it to class next tuesday too.. and good news is assignment date got push back one week!! yippee~ was rather happy as no need so rush but thursday will discuss everything finish during our break.. hehe.. so happy for myself.. hopefully my other assignments also kays!! heex..
we went canteen 1 during break time today.. and finally like so long liao i had my kaki fuyong set.. yummy.. i didnt drink bubbles tea in school kays.. i am being a good ger for sure.. wahaha.. hmm.. then went for FM tutorial.. was quite pleased for myself cause i still remember my POA stuffs!! wah happy lah.. hopefully the rest too.. haha.. going to work hard for this semester too!! yvonne JIA YOU oh!!! haha.. =D but DLE lecture i wasnt paying attention.. i was sms-ing jazz.. hoho.. and i dont really like how the lecturer teach.. as a result i couldnt get any information inside my brain.. i pray hard that DLE wasnt that difficult afterall.. i seriously need to do self studying soon.. if not i couldnt survive for my GPA of at least 3 kays.. i must study!!!
met up with jazz after school at causeway point.. i not saying anything.. but i am scolding her.. she doesnt really noe the consequences.. i just hope that she doesnt bei piAN bah.. whoever is that person dont be a cheater.. step out and give money back to her.. it is her hard earn money kays!! i really had no choice but to scold her.. hopefully her bf can wake her up.. then saw gary and tinshen at causeway point too.. in the end we had dinner together.. jazz and tinshen were eating yoshinoya.. wah i got a little craving for it.. then i drank bubbles tea with gary and tinshen too.. yum yum!! then tinshen went home after dinner while me.. jazz and gary went arcade!! wah gary so li hai lah.. he was playing the dancing de.. then the songs all so high.. got clubbing mood ar.. jazz also.. so we date each other to club on 30may.. haha.. going to ask others along too.. haha.. i am club craze le lah.. cannot!! hoho..
accompany jazz to buy the stickers for her tutees.. she so kind to her tutees sia.. but not to me.. she doesnt want to buy me the winnie the pooh de.. bad ger!! haha.. =P
hopefully she is fine now.. =)) everything will be a learning lesson to her bah.. hmm.. nothing i can say much too.. but hopefully she still remember our date on 30may!! gary too.. haha.. wonder who should i call too.. haha..
