Sunday, January 28, 2007
haish.. i should i say about today.. i am totally sad and miserable.. ytd i was happy and blog about everything.. but just one night.. and everything is gone.. my daddy dun really approve me in buying a new pair of spect.. he said that there is not a need to do.. but.. i really want a new spect.. my degree had increased and wearing my spect and contact lenses make me finding it hard to see something as the degree is different now.. it really make my eyes tired after a while.. i alrdy told my mum about it long ago.. but she only said wait until next year.. now is alrdy her next year and she agreed to let me make one.. but just because of dad.. and i dun get to have a new spect.. whatever my bro want daddy and mumm sure gave him.. all they said was i wasting too much money.. hello.. i am in poly now and many things need to use money to buy.. even my assignments.. and everyday.. u jus give me so little of allowance and how u expect me to save the money and buy the things i need.. always u will say use your saving to buy.. but i only left with $10.. how am i suppose to buy the things i need?? really really upset.. from young.. everything seems soo different.. my daddy could just buy what my bro want.. and u imagine.. one time he bought me my bro my cousins all to toy r us.. everyone got a toy each.. and my bro one was costing about $100.. when i saw one i like which was the barbie doll.. he totally ignored me and just walked away to the cashier.. i was upset on the spot i cried.. my ah ma saw and she bought it for me.. in my life.. my cousins all had 2 or more barbie dolls which their parents bought for them.. but me.. i only had one.. and i treasured that barbie doll alot.. my bro got whatever he wanted.. his room had more den 1 set of power rangers.. all cost almost $100.. haish.. what can i really said?? parents always said that i am useless.. all i noe is to enjoy.. i am really really very upset.. what am i to them?? no one listen to me.. no one care for me..
ok fine.. i stop saying everything.. but today just a very upset blog ba..
actually i should be going down to see fei lun hai with rain jiabao stella zhiying all de.. but i din go in the end.. i couldnt finish my assignments and ended up.. things happened.. i am sad.. not that i always wanted it to be like that.. but things are just unpredicted.. i told myself to make sure i finished everything by ytd night.. but i went out in the afternoon.. and all i had was to blame it on myself.. everyone was not happy with me again as i last min said i am not going.. everytime i will be me making people angry and upset.. what can i do then?? i hate the lifestyle of mine now..
exam is coming and everything is not finished yet.. tml having mock exam but i am still online chatting and chatting.. what i said is i am afraid that i might not be able to pass my modules and i repeat another year of year 1.. people coming to me and said work hard and then i wouldnt repeat.. but i simply cant do that.. my mind is not working anymore.. my life had been so miserable.. nothing can actually make me smile.. i am feeling down.. sometimes i am thinking if i really fail and have to repeat another year.. what will i do?? my parents will scold.. AHHHHH!!!!! i dunno what i should do..
my frenz are in trouble and i dunno what to help.. all i can do is to try and console them.. but it seems like i am unable to help them much.. why am i having all these miserable stuffs?? did i do anything which make the god angry and they are punishing me?? all i want is just a very simple life.. but it seems not to be like what i want.. i just pray that all my frenz are happy and nothing harm them.. i dun wish to see anyone crying and sad.. this also include me ba.. =)
ok fine.. i stop saying everything.. but today just a very upset blog ba..
actually i should be going down to see fei lun hai with rain jiabao stella zhiying all de.. but i din go in the end.. i couldnt finish my assignments and ended up.. things happened.. i am sad.. not that i always wanted it to be like that.. but things are just unpredicted.. i told myself to make sure i finished everything by ytd night.. but i went out in the afternoon.. and all i had was to blame it on myself.. everyone was not happy with me again as i last min said i am not going.. everytime i will be me making people angry and upset.. what can i do then?? i hate the lifestyle of mine now..
exam is coming and everything is not finished yet.. tml having mock exam but i am still online chatting and chatting.. what i said is i am afraid that i might not be able to pass my modules and i repeat another year of year 1.. people coming to me and said work hard and then i wouldnt repeat.. but i simply cant do that.. my mind is not working anymore.. my life had been so miserable.. nothing can actually make me smile.. i am feeling down.. sometimes i am thinking if i really fail and have to repeat another year.. what will i do?? my parents will scold.. AHHHHH!!!!! i dunno what i should do..
my frenz are in trouble and i dunno what to help.. all i can do is to try and console them.. but it seems like i am unable to help them much.. why am i having all these miserable stuffs?? did i do anything which make the god angry and they are punishing me?? all i want is just a very simple life.. but it seems not to be like what i want.. i just pray that all my frenz are happy and nothing harm them.. i dun wish to see anyone crying and sad.. this also include me ba.. =)
we leave a mark @ 7:32 PM.
